The First Homely House
AKA The Purple Plot Bunnies
Part Thirty-three
Me Gusta Southron
Written by
Zhie with creative consultation by Maggie and Monty.
Rated PG13. Work In Progress
The main characters are Haldir and Nibbles the Purple Bunny. Many
supporting characters are involved in these stories.
"Quit it already," demanded Celebdreth, tossing a pillow toward the
twins, not quite caring which it hit.
"Sorry, but the days of wine and roses are over," apologized
Elrohir.
Catching the pillow, Elladan added, "And ribbons and games and cavorting
in the caves. We have come to the conclusion that if neither of us can agree
upon whom should properly court Glorcheniel, then neither of us shall do it and
we shall do it together."
"This is madness!" complained Celebdreth. He walked across the room
and sat between them, crossing his arms in a huff. "You are like brothers
to me, and yet you are my best friends, cousins. I have no other friends, not
truly. What am I to do when you run off and marry your beloved? How came you to
this sudden decision without my consent?"
"Your consent!" laughed Elladan. "Ai, you remind me of our
father, not our brother!" He affectionately kissed the younger elf on the
top of his head as Elrohir smirked. "May we seek your permission now?"
"No! Never," he pouted, wriggling away from the arm Elrohir placed
around him halfheartedly. "I still can't believe this. I shall wave goodbye
to you and be left alone in the house, living sad and alone for the rest of my
days."
"Oh, will you listen to him, El?" Elladan shook his head. "Celebdreth,
we've not even formally asked permission. You're the first to be told."
"Thank you," he mumbled unappreciatively.
Elrohir ruffled his cousin's mane playfully. "Celebdreth," he said,
"do you think we are going to run off and steal her away somewhere? Nay, we
are honorable. We plan to show the greatest respect. First, we are going to wait
a few weeks until she returns from visiting her family. Then, we shall go to
everyone individually and explain ourselves – this isn't something to rush
into. We will not likely be married for a few years."
"That gives us plenty of time to find a nice girl for you," teased
Elladan.
"I can find my own girls," he defended.
"Celebdreth, that is precisely your problem," scolded Elrohir.
"Why must you always acquire them in pairs?"
"What?" Celebdreth stood up and paced the room. "You're a fine
one to talk, both of you! How is it okay for Glorcheniel to get both of you,
while I can only have one elleth?"
Elladan sighed and stood up, walking to Celebdreth to slow down his pacing.
When he could not, he fell in step beside him. "You've gained status as a
very loose sort of elf," he said.
"Loose? Loose!"
"Yes, loose, now stop shouting, you're hurting my head," complained
Elladan. "You walk around with more than one beauty on your arm, you kiss
them all, you touch them in a publicly indecent manner – but `tis alright here
in the Kastle," he said quickly as Celebdreth's fists balled up. "When
you have one elleth, it is a good balance. When you have two, they both want to
be more dominant, and that always causes problems. Look what happened with
Caliel and Isilwen."
Celebdreth finally halted. "That still doesn't explain you and Elrohir."
"With males, `tis different," spoke up Elrohir. "An elleth
already feels that on some level she is submitting to the elf – she joins his
house, she lives in his home and so forth. Often we are referred to as Elrond's
sons, but never as Celebrian's, and quite honestly, she had a lot more to do
with our birth than he did! From the elleth's point of view, she wouldn't want
to have another elleth around that might be more dominant than she is. Perhaps
it can work between us and Glorcheniel because we do not have that view. True,
one of us is more dominant than the other, that I will not deny, but we can
accept that, and we are not jealous of one another, and it simply feels as if it
is the thing for us to do."
"Ah." Celebdreth still did not quite look convinced. "You know
I am happy for you, and I will be happy for you, but..."
"You still don't think it will work," both of his cousins
responded.
"I told you to quit that!" said Celebdreth, retrieving his boots
from under the couch.
Elrohir stood up with alarm. "We're sorry, Celebdreth. Please, don't run
off, it's late. Just get some sleep and we can talk more tomorrow."
"I need a drink," he mumbled, walking out of the suite they were
using. Since Legolas' return, they had been able to curry many favors out of the
now part-owner of the inn and dancehall. Trudging down the steps, Celebdreth
found no one in the hallway or in the lobby as he entered the dancehall and
approached the bar.
Celebdreth found that nearly everyone had left, though there were not many
elves to be found during the winter. The passes were not ideal for the horses to
cross, and so most elves who lived near the shore went into the cities after the
harvest and stayed with family until the spring. The inhabitants of the First
Homely House stayed right where they were, and the few elves who remained in the
eastern valley stayed at the King's Kastle, making for more subdued
entertainment than usual.
Consequently, the caves were not open, and the musicians had gone to bed at a
decent hour. Haldir was sitting at the bar conversing with Legolas, who was
tending it, and there was an elleth at the opposite end hunched over a large
book and holding a drink in her left hand, just off to the side of the book.
"You're up late," remarked Legolas. "Anything I can get
you?"
"I could say the same," answered Celebdreth as he sat down next to
Haldir. "Coffee, please, if there is any." He watched both Haldir and
Legolas lift their mugs before Legolas walked to the small hearth behind the
counter to get another mug of it. "I wasn't sure that the bar would still
be open."
"Well," answered his uncle, lowering his voice, "we would have
retired, but he doesn't want to be rude and ask her to leave, and I don't think
it is my place. So I offered to stay here and keep him awake until she left, but
that was nearly four hours ago." Haldir smirked across the bar as he
watched Legolas and added, "I'm about ready to leave and risk getting
kicked out of bed when he finally comes to our room."
"Perhaps I could persuade her to leave," offered Celebdreth, a
wicked glint in his eye.
Haldir shook his head. "You don't want to offend her. She's staying
another few months or perhaps Legolas would have said something."
Frowning, Celebdreth shrugged as Legolas returned with a fresh mug of hot
coffee for him. "I wasn't going to toss her over my shoulder and carry her
upstairs or anything like that," he snapped back. Haldir and Legolas
exchanged glances, unsure of what to make of Celebdreth's behavior as he sipped
his coffee. "Is there any sugar?" he asked, looking around.
"I think I have some..." Legolas looked around, and then his eyes
fell to the end where the elleth was sitting. "Oh, it's down there, she
asked for it earlier."
Celebdreth looked down where the elleth sat and was surprised to see her eyes
shift toward him momentarily before she went back to her book. Picking up his
mug from the counter, Celebdreth walked toward her. "Greetings," he
said as he approached.
"Good evening," replied the elleth without looking up.
"Good morning," responded Celebdreth, somewhat pointedly. He
checked himself, and then asked, "I was wondering, if you would be so kind,
as to pass the sugar?"
The elleth looked up from her book, but not at Celebdreth. Instead, she
raised her head with her eyes straight forward, and then looked to her right
where the sugar bowl was. "Why do you not simply walk around behind me and
retrieve it yourself?" she asked.
"Because it would be ever such a delight to have you pass it to me
instead," he answered suavely, and added, "I had just but a glimpse of
your beautiful brown eyes the first time you looked up at me."
The elleth said nothing, merely picking up the bowl with her free hand and
moving it over her books to the other side of the counter. She then looked back
down at her book.
Sadly, Celebdreth spooned sugar into his mug, and then gave a little nod of
his head. "Thank you ever so, m'lady," he said as he turned to walk
back to where Haldir and Legolas were pretending not to watch.
"De nada," she replied. Celebdreth froze and turned around.
"Al contrario fue un placer," answered Celebdreth with a smirk. The
elleth suddenly looked up. She was so shocked, her glass fell from her hand, but
Celebdreth stepped forward, caught it, placed it on the counter, and then turned
and went back without a drop of either drink spilling to the floor.
"What was that all about?" asked Legolas as Celebdreth sat down
rather smugly on the stool.
"She speaks Southron," Celebdreth answered. "As do I."
The second sentence was said very haughtily, and in a manner that made Legolas
wonder if it was Haldir's child and not Rumil's that he was talking to.
"Oh, not that foul language again," complained Haldir, shaking his
head. "There are some things that should not have been brought to Valinor,"
he said, looking at Legolas.
"If this is going to get us into another conversation about Gimli-"
he warned, waving a bar rag at Haldir's nose.
Celebdreth felt a light touch on his shoulder and turned to see the elleth
had silently walked over. She was looking past him at Legolas, and particularly
at Haldir with a bit of distaste, but smiled when Celebdreth did. "¿Disculpe,
podria hablar con usted?" said the elleth
"No hay nada de que disculparse," answered Celebdreth, taking her
hand in his. He lifted her fingers to his lips and gently kissed the back of her
hand. "Tus ojos son mas hermosos que la primera vez que los vi, pero tu
primera mirada estara por siempre atesorada en mi Corazon."
"I truly hate that language," Haldir mumbled in Westron.
"Because you don't like the sound of it, or because you can't understand
it?" wondered Legolas.
"Southron is a difficult tongue to learn, and you need not fault
yourself for not being able to master it," spoke the elleth in absolutely
perfect Westron, no hint of an accent whatsoever. "It takes a certain
amount of intelligence to be so gifted to learn a language such as Southron."
Haldir slowly turned his head to look at Legolas. "I think she just
insulted me," he said in Noldorin. To his dismay, he was answered in
Noldorin, but not by Legolas.
"While you ponder whether I did or not, would you kindly allow us a bit
of privacy?" The elleth then made a shooing motion with her hand and sat
down next to Celebdreth's right side, paying no further attention to Haldir or
Legolas.
Chuckling at the turn of events, Legolas put out the fire in the hearth by
shutting the small iron doors and then motioned that he was leaving. Haldir gave
the elleth a final contemptuous look before leaving, but she was already deep in
discussion with Celebdreth and did not notice.
"Oh, thank you. I thought they'd never leave!" she exclaimed when
the hall was finally emptied of everyone but Celebdreth and the elleth. "Beineilian,"
she said, offering her hand again, which Celebdreth once more kissed. She smiled
and asked, "Do you always do that?"
"No, not always," he replied, not letting go of her hand.
"Actually, not usually," he admitted sheepishly. "I don't usually
spend much time with ladies," he said, and then said quickly, "Not
that I spend any time with ellin! I mean, it isn't that I'm interested in them
– well, not as... oh, this is coming out all wrong," he sighed
mournfully. "What I mean is, you're quite... sophisticated, compared to the
ellith I tend to, um..."
"Kiss?" she asked.
"Yes. Well, no! Well..."
Beineilian smiled seductively. "How exactly do you kiss the
unsophisticated ellith you spend time with?"
"Oh... it's hard to describe," he said. He paused and gave her a
sideways look. "I'd probably have to show you." The elleth's
expression was one that begged him to continue, and without further warning,
Celebdreth slid his hand up along her face, capturing her cheek to pull her
closer as he leaned in to kiss her quite soundly. "It's a bit like that,
darling," he said, winking at her as his usual sly self resurfaced.
"Mmm. What did you say your name was?"
"I didn't. It's Celebdreth."
Beineilian looked Celebdreth over and said, "How long have you spoken
Southron?"
"I don't recall. Lord Elrond taught me a bit, and I picked up the rest
independently," he replied.
"Mmm." The elleth's eyes traveled over his form once again. "I
dreamed about you last night."
"You- wait, what?" Celebdreth's heart beat in his chest, and he
looked around to see if the room was truly empty. "You dreamed about
me?"
"Well, I dreamed about a tall elf with cinnamon hair," she began.
"Yes?"
Her eyes traveled down past his chest and then back up again. "Handsome
and charming, and just a little arrogant."
Celebdreth blushed. "Yes," he admitted.
"And he spoke to me in Southron..." she continued.
"Si," he said with a grin.
"...as we made love in the early morning hours."
Celebdreth blinked, glad that his mug was firmly on the top of the counter, or
he knew it would have fallen from his hand. Beineilian stood up and drew a chain
up from around her neck, on which hung a key not unlike the one he had to the
suite he shared with the twins. "Ven, vamos a hablar Sureño," she
said seductively in his ear as she dangled the key over his shoulder before
letting it drop into his lap. Her tongue darted out and traced the edge of his
ear to the very point before she added, "Room forty-seven. Ten minutes.
Bring my books," and walked out of the hall.
After a few minutes of just breathing, Celebdreth picked up the key, and then
walked around the counter to retrieve a bottle of cool wine from the small
cellar, hoping Legolas would understand the need for it. He shook his head as he
walked toward the stairs. "They lied to me, both of them," he mumbled
to himself. "I am certainly NOT going to be the dominant one..."
Continued...
Notes
Introducing and Dedicated to Beinie, the new elleth.
*Pounces and huggles Laura* I'm so glad that Celebdreth found a good home.
Big thanks to Laura for the translations!
De nada – There is nothing to thank me for.
Al contrario fue un placer - On the contrary it was my pleasure
¿Disculpe podria hablar con usted? - pardon me could we talk
No hay nada de que disculparse – Please, there is nothing to excuse
Tus ojos son mas hermosos que la primera vez que los vi, pero tu
primera mirada estara por siempre atesorada en mi Corazon - Your
eyes are more beautiful than the first time I saw them, but your
first glance will always be dear to my heart.
Ven, vamos a hablar Sureño – Come, let us speak Southron